


Relatively Sirius

by AyumiUK (weirdpianist)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Crack, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Dementors, Gen, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-06 21:03:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8769235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weirdpianist/pseuds/AyumiUK
Summary: They both agreed the previous year hadn't happened. It's not like there was a new race of soul-sucking creatures roaming around.
(A Dementor origin fic.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> I found this lying around on a back-up of my old phone. It's crack, like 95% of everything I write. orz

Both times he spawned were unintentional.

The first was an accident.

...as much as amassing so much power to the point it gained sentience could be called an accident. Really, it was a disaster all around.

It happened during the height of his reign. From the concentration of darkness and fear, a tiny pathetic thing emerged. She was deathly pale, and looked as if the slightest breeze could fling her away. The girl had so much presence Pitch didn't even see her at first.

To be more specific, Pitch didn't notice she was there until she was of age and brought a peasant boy home.

Slightly taken aback, he blessed(?) their union automatically. Only later, when he was holding his first grandson, did he truly understand what had happened.

That grandson went on to become the founder of a certain wizarding family.

If one's mother is invisible to most of the population, things are bond to be very confusing. Especially to outsiders. Thus, the family started out with a stellar reputation.

* * *

 

A few centuries later, Pitch met Jack Frost for the first time. He had been following a self-made emperor for a while, and had ended up in Russia.

So many deaths! So much despair!

And amidst all that, a young spirit kept blanketing the land in snow.

He was quite taken with the vision of lovely despair in front of him.

Shared glaces.

"You... Can see me?" Jack waved in front of the weirdo in black. After a moment of silence, his shoulders hunched and he frustratedly flung a snowball on the man's head.

Exchanged caresses.

"Of course I can." Enraged, Pitch suspended the young spirit by front of his shirt.

And a kiss.

"What the-"

"I'm so happy I could kiss you!"

"Idiot! This expression hasn't been invented yet! It's not literal. Or, well, most of the time it isn't. But still, you should ask before you kiss."

"Well, excuse me, stick in the mud!" Jack's eyes glinted deviously.

"That doesn't exist eit-Hmmmph!"

…later, they both agreed the previous year hadn't happened.

At all.

It's not like there was a new race of soul-sucking creatures roaming around.

Who may or may not have looked the other way when their distant cousin escaped prison as a dog.

**Author's Note:**

> Nightmare + Cold = Dementor  
> Sorry. orz
> 
> I also found a draft for a Frozen sequel-Jack's side of the family. A bit less traumatizing than this one.


End file.
